Life is Constant

Well a revelation has just bestowed itself upon me. Throughout my life i have lived to please others. I don't really care what they think about me but regardless i want people to be happy, and a good reputation always helps. So i do what i can to make this a reality.
When i was about 17 my mother told me it was time to be "selfish" i wish i took her advice from that point. It has taken me two years. In fact to this exact moment that i could analyze that word. You see words to me are defined on an individual bases you must learn there general meaning then attach your own meaning to it. So -ish as a suffix can be an approximate. So i must think of my self but not completely because there is room for others.

You create your own reality is what i am often told by Karl. I had a conversation with him about this; and came to the conclusion that your reality is of a co-creation nature. You cannot control certain events that come upon you. But you can control the affect it has upon you. Examples include completely ignoring something (witch has its own ramifications), or simply juts not letting something eat you up inside.

Also i just finished the book 1984 by George Orwell. OMG that book was trippy. Talking about at totalitarian government and how they could control history by erasing recorded events and altering them, and all the implementations of control over the people. It talked about three word powers that were pretty much the same in competition with each other. The main character Winston reminds me of myself i can always relate to main characters in good books. Anyhow there was something that hit me while i was reading. Winston was reading a book by a character called Goldstein (the liberator) it was a set up. But the booked talked about classes. High class always wants to remain in power, however loose it when they get "soft" is how he put it. The Middle class wants to become the rich class and use the poor in order to get there with promises of Freedom and Justice that are not fully fulfilled once they get the power. There is a constant switch between the Middle and High. The Lower class desires a truly peacefully world were everyone is equal were the lines between the different classes are finer.

However he is wrong, much has changed since he wrote the book. The war for peace and equility has been diverted by most all within the classes. The Self is no longer -ish it is completely self. People that are poor use each other like crabs in a pot trying to get to the top. Out of a hundred only one gets close to paradise. And he/she does not have enough hands or wits to help the others. The hope lies in the "proles" tha' "Ghetto" if we can ever unit and work together. If we can uncover their plan. The only way for the lower class to win is to become the High and from there we can make the world equal if participants are not lured to corruption. Now personally i doubt this will happen in United States. I personally believe that we need to make another country or rebuild Current United States in order to suit this idealistic world. The economy in united states would need to take some serious reconstruction. Perhaps The introduction of a new product in the market would be the first step. Hemp i would say, it would create a whole bunch of jobs because it can be used so diversely from; fuel to clothes and paper. This could be down in my new country. Thats what i dream about, like Marcus Garvey. He had the right idea. Time to go back to Africa reorganize it and show the world how to live. Close off Africa to the rest of the world for seven years and emerge as a non-violent super-power focused only mainly on defense (just in-case) and very little on offense. A good defense is the best offense.

Anyhow thank you for reading my random thoughts if you did....

In HIM name,
.:Bones/Dread:.